The Skinny: Tuesday, May 12th, 2015

The Skinny is back, baby! As you most likely have noticed, the site is going through a bit of a transitional phase right now. In the near future, we will be firing on all cylinders, pumping out extremely consistent, extremely reliable, extremely beautiful content.

What does “transitional” phase mean? Well, that’s a good question. I don’t really know. But, for the time being, allow it to mean “we’re not where we want to be, but we will be very, very soon.”

Kapish? Cool. Let’s crush some news.



Brady, Patriots Disciplined

Yesterday the Earth shook with the news of Roger Goodell and the NFL dropping the hammer on Tom Brady and the New England Patriots, suspending TB12 for 4 games without pay, fining the Patriots $1 million and making the organization forfeit first and fourth-round draft picks.

This comes less than a week after the release of the Wells’ Report, a 200+ page investigative report that determined “it is more likely than not” that the Patriots were intentionally deflating footballs. The report also determined that Tom Brady was “at least generally aware” of the violation.

The punishment has drawn extreme feedback from all angles. Patriots supporters are irate. Patriots haters are demanding more. The Pats are a polarizing organization, so very few sit anywhere near the fence. It’s a bloodbath out there, and will continue to be for a while.

Tom Brady will appeal the suspension, likely win and get 4 games knocked down to 2.

Another Nepal Earthquake Hits

Overnight a 7.3 magnitude earthquake struck Nepal, killing at least 32 and injuring thousands more. This strike comes less than 3 weeks after a 7.8 magnitude quake hit the same region, killing more than 8,000.

Several significant aftershocks followed the major quake, with the highest measuring at 6.3 on the Richter Scale.

Another Atheist Blogger Hacked to Death In Bangladesh

Ananta Bijoy Das, 32, was killed Tuesday morning while walking to work near his apartment in the Bangladeshi city of Sylhet. Four masked men attacked Das with cleavers and machetes, hacking him to death on the street.

Das was an atheist blogger, frequently critical of Islam. He is at least the third case this year of an online writer being hacked to death on public streets in Bangladesh.

“It’s one after another after another,” head of the Blogger and Online Activists Network in Bangladesh, Imran Sarker, commented. “It’s the same scenario again and again. It’s very troubling.”

Verizon to Buy AOL for $4.4 Billion

LOL AOL! What a comeback! Seriously, AOL is still a thing? I would have thought you could walk into AOL HQ, say, “You’ve got mail!”, offer them a Klondike bar and they’d toss you the key and be like, “Yep, take it.” $4 billion!? You dogs!

George Zimmerman Shot

Remember George Zimmerman, the dude that killed Treyvon Martin in Florida and got off? Well, he was shot yesterday. Apparently he and neighbor Matthew Apperson really don’t like each other, and Apperson fired a shot through Zimmerman’s car window. He was not struck by the bullet, but suffered minor injuries from the incident.

McMurdo, Antarctica Temperature

The temperature in McMurdo, Antarctica is -14°F right now. With wind chill, it feels like -31°F.

This has no effect on your life, I just thought it was interesting.


Dow: 18,106, -86 (-0.47%)  S&P 500: 2,105, -11 (-0.51%)

AB InBev ($BUD) surprised investors with big profits yesterday, despite a 1.2% drop in quarterly beer sales. How’d they manage this? Welp, they were ingeniously hedging their own stock.

Dish Network reported $351 million in quarterly earnings Monday, about twice what was expected. This is good, but investors weren’t overly impressed; shares fell 0.7% due to its shrinking subscriber base.

Today we’ve looking out for first quarter earnings from GoDaddy and Zillow.

Market Snacks

Missing Plane

Still missing. Over 14 months.

Stanley Cup Playoffs

Tonight we’ve got Montreal vs Tampa Bay for game 6 in Tampa. The Bolts lead 3-2, but star Ryan Callahan was listed as out indefinitely after an emergency appendectomy.

Tomorrow night we’ve got game 7, Washington at New York Rangers. Ovechkin guaranteed a win, which spices things up a bit. Should be a doozy.

NBA Playoffs 

LeBron is causing more player/coach drama in Cleveland, slamming Blatt after a timeout blunder and an unpopular play call for the buzzer beater. He originally had LeBron inbounding, which James quickly scrapped, calling for himself to get the ball and take the shot. He did, he made it, and the Cavs won, tying the series at 2-2.

Super Important Fact

In Argentina, the most Googled product is “beer.” In Brazil, it’s “prostitute.”

Source: BI

As you can see, lotta hot action out there. Hope you can digest it all.

Have a Tuesday, folks. Have yourselves a nice Tuesday.


 Sources: Brady photoCover photo; CNN; ESPN

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