Hi. The Skinny. Yes. Let’s do it.
ISIS Wannabes Arrested in NYC
Three men were arrested yesterday in New York City with plans of terror. They wanted to hijack a plane and give it to ISIS, they wanted to join the U.S. military to kill soldiers, and they wanted to assassinate President Obama.
One of the men was arrested while trying to catch a flight to Turkey.
The bacteria C. difficile is a deadly bacteria usually found in hospitals. After several patients were infected by the bacteria at doctor’s offices in Ohio, however, the CDC conducted a study that found it on surfaces in six of seven outpatient facilities in the state.
A larger investigation is underway to determine if this is a national problem.
A human rights activist claims ISIS has kidnapped 150 Christian villagers in northern Syria and plans to release a video directed at Obama and other world leaders threatening to kill the villagers.
The hostages are mostly women, children and elderly folk.
Boston Marathon Bombing Trial
The scumbag bomber’s trial could begin as early as next week. A pool of 70 potential jurors remains after 256 were questioned for 21 days, and final selections should be done by early next week. If so, the trial would begin immediately after.
‘Jihadi John,’ the English-speaking ISIS member appearing in several western hostage beheading videos, has been identified as Mohammed Emwazi, a Kuwaiti-born Londoner (as in London, England). Officials have refused to confirm the report, and neither will CNN, but the Washington Post and Reuters are pretty convinced, citing one of Emwazi’s close friends in London.
Iran Destroys Mock U.S. Aircraft Carrier
Iran boasted via their semi-official news agency yesterday of a military drill in which they destroyed a mock U.S. Nimitz-class aircraft carrier, which are the world’s largest warships. In one of the funniest quotes I’ve ever read, Iran’s Rear Adm. Ali Fadavi said, “We have the most advanced sea mines which cannot be imagined by the Americans.”
After learning of the mock ship last year, one U.S. official described it as more of a Hollywood set than an actual warship.
Missing Plane Found!
Just kidding. Still missing. 355 days.
Dow: 18,225, +15 (+0.08%) S&P 500: 2,114, -2 (-0.08%)
Target inched up yesterday as its stores open at least a year reported a 4% increase in sales from the same period in 2013, leading to $21.75 billion in revenue.
Hewlett-Packard, on the other hand, is not doing so well; 4th quarter revenue fell 5% and profits fell 4%.
And, in toy land, all is great. Lego reported its 10th straight year of sales gains, climbing 15% last year. The company almost went bankrupt in 2005, so this is a nice little turnaround.
Today we’re got quarterlies from Budweiser and SeaWorld.
NFL – There is a Dez Bryant incident gaining momentum and building serious anticipation. Reportedly, Bryant, several of Bryant’s registered cars, and a semi unconscious woman being dragged were all involved together in a Texas Walmart parking lot in 2011. The incident was largely cleared by responding police at the time, but a surveillance video exists that is expected to blow this thing wide open.
NHL – After suffering an awkward impact with the boards on Tuesday night, Patrick Kane will miss 12 weeks; he underwent surgery yesterday to repair a fractured left clavicle. Kaner was tied for the NHL scoring lead.
NBA – The Dallas Mavericks have suspended Rajon Rondo for one game following a heated altercation with coach Rick Carlisle; the incident occurred on the sidelines during Tuesday night’s game against Toronto.
Golf – The boys are at the Honda Classic at PGA National this week. Rory is making his 2015 PGA Tour debut; he’s finished first or second in his last 7 events on the European Tour, so he’s coming in hot. Real hot. After winning this tournament in 2012 and losing in a playoff in 2014, I’d be shocked if he didn’t win this week.
In bigger-picture golf news, the PGA of America announced Davis Love III as the 2016 Ryder Cup Captain and introduced an arsenal of new protocols directing the U.S. down more of a “continuity-friendly” path for the future of the Ryder Cup.
Also, the PGA Tour announced that Quail Hollow Golf Club in Charlotte will host the 2021 Presidents Cup. The course hosts the PGA Tour’s Wells Fargo Championship every year and will host the 2017 PGA Championship.
MLB – Teams are assembling for spring training camp, which is wild. Games begin next week.
ESPN; MLB; NBA; NHL; Golf Channel
OK! magazine published a report that Kim Kardashian has a ‘professional selfie retoucher.’ That retoucher makes $100,000.
Super Important Fact
Rolls-Royce cars are actually made by BMW; the Rolls-Royce that trades on stock exchanges makes airplane engines.
Whoop, there it is. Although it’s cold and snowy everywhere, it kinda sorta feels like we’re getting close to spring. I don’t know if that’s because the PGA Tour has hit the Florida swing or because the weather patterns have made me delusional, but it feels that way.
We’re only 33 days from April 1st… should be shirtless on the back porch in no time.