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The Skinny: Friday, November 14th, 2014

The Skinny: Friday, November 14th, 2014

Wow, it’s Friday. That really dragged along. This won’t drag along. This will be quick. This will be fun. This will be informational.

This shall be The Skinny. Here we go.

 

Barry, Immigration

Obama announced yesterday that he is ready to act on immigration reform by the end of the year. The urgency comes of course because Congress will be flooded with Republicans come January. Barry told Republican Congressional leadership that he would like to work out a legislative solution with Congress, but that he is prepared to move forward without it if he must.

This would be by executive order, which would send tensions through the roof entering the final 2 years of Barry’s term.

ISIS Leader Sends Message

For several days it was believed that ISIS leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi was injured in a coalition airstrike. An audio released yesterday from al-Baghdadi (which analysts believe is authentic) basically taunts the coalition, saying we missed, calling us “terrified, weak and powerless” and saying our coalition is a “failure.”

ISIS also announced this week that the deranged terror group plans on minting and implementing their own currency. They believe the world’s current financial system is, of course, that of the infidels, so they’ll be making their own.

Russian Cold War II?

Russia will be sending long-range bombers to patrol the Gulf of Mexico. Defense Minister Sergey Shoigu said Russia would like to maintain “military presence in the western Atlantic and eastern Pacific, as well as the Caribbean and the Gulf of Mexico.” This is basically a response to Western involvement in Ukraine. Russia is kinda saying, “You mess with us over by us, we’ll mess with you over by you.”

If you see something that looks like this, throw rocks.

White House Fence Jumping Situation

In September, a crazy guy jumped the White House fence, ran across the lawn and entered the White House, getting as deep as the East Room. The Department of Homeland Security has released a review of the incident; it’s not good for the Secret Service. It basically says there were multiple breakdowns on multiple levels and that the Secret Service sucks.

The incident led to resignation for the Director of the Secret Service.

Comet Lander

The European Space Agency’s Philae lander is still on a comet sending data back to Earth. It has been successfully sending images and data all week, but it’s running out of juice. The probe landed next to a cliff that is blocking sunlight from hitting its solar panels, not allowing it to charge its batteries.

CNN

Missing Plane

Still missing.

Economy

Dow: 17,653, +41 (+0.23%)  S&P 500: 2,039, +1 (+0.05%)

Yep. Dow closed up 41 for the day. That’s the 25th record high of the year. Stocks were up thanks to some good jobs data and good quarterlies from American retailers. 

In not-so-good news, SeaWorld stock is still drowning. The company has struggled since the Blackfish documentary came out last year; it was down 10% earlier in the week after poor earnings and hasn’t made much of a comeback since.

Today we’ve got the monthly retail sales report.

Sports

NFL – Miami (6-4) beat Buffalo (5-5) on Thursday Night Football last night, 22-9. It wasn’t a particularly exciting game.

NHL – 9 games last night.

Screenshot 2014-11-14 08.25.57

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Screenshot 2014-11-14 08.26.26

NBA – 4 games last night. The 76ers are literally the worst team in the history of the NBA. Derrick Rose left with a hamstring injury; it doesn’t sound to be overly serious, but it’s Derrick Rose.

Screenshot 2014-11-14 08.28.53

Entertainment

Kim is now fully nude in these weird, oily, champagne-ey pictures. It amazes me this is news after how “exposed” she’s been before.

Trending

Screenshot 2014-11-14 07.57.05

The Book

Super Important Fact

Speaking of Blackfish, here’s a SeaWorld fact. Don Goldsberry, who was a marine “Cowboy” who worked for SeaWorld, once hired divers to slit open the bellies of four orcas, fill them with rocks, and sink them to the bottom of the ocean so their deaths would not be discovered. This was done to avoid PR problems.

Brutal. Love orcas.

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Sea World of Hurt


Have a morning. Have a day. Have a weekend.

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Thumbs Up Photo; Cover photoMarket Snacks

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