(Skewed) List of All-Time Best Disney Princesses

Elsa from Frozen takes #1 overall in all-time Princess Ranking

Fun Fact: did you know that Finding Nemo is the best selling DVD of all time? Well, it is. Is it the best movie of all time? No. Is it close? Yes, but that’s not that point. There are older movies that are better than Finding Nemo. Just like there are older Princesses who are more popular than the ones in the movie Frozen. This list is your classic case of an unfair starting ground. Monetary rankings do not imply a quality list.

According to a Seventeen Magazine article, “The ranking was based on how much money each made through the re-sale of their Disney merchandise (like dolls, T-shirts, etc.) on e-Bay, from May 2013 until now.”

(Seventeen Magazine)

Quick question. Who’s waking up everyone morning with a random urge to buy Snow White or Cinderella merchandise? Those movies came out in like 1694. Don’t see how anyone could make the executive decision to base a list on re-sale money made on eBay sales starting in May 2013, when Frozen just came out this past year. The nerve. This clearly causes a skewed list. This doesn’t mean i didn’t enjoy Frozen. I heard all the hype about it, I watched it, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. But to have a list that promotes Elsa number one all-time already? For shame. Show some respect to the legends. Snow White and Cinderella are straight up the LeBron James and Kevin Durant of Disney princesses, and I think that’s the way it should be forever, right? At least give me that until the day I die: the correct list of the best Disney princesses. Show me that there is a little hope left in this world that’s now run by Macklemore and twerking. Snow White and Cinderella are iconic princesses. And they are going to be knocked off the throne by Elsa? Goodness. Maybe in due time they can make a new argument for the best princesses of all time, and I’m sure I will respect the list. One with integrity. But for now, don’t be publishing monetarily biased lists, even if they are based on “facts.” Show some heart.

Here’s the final tally:

1. Elsa – $3,397,816

2. Cinderella – $2,504,259

3. Snow White – $2,301,831

4. Anna -$2,165,12

5. Ariel – $1,483,384

6. Rapunzel – $598,056

7. Aurora – $215,856

8. Merida – $282,188

9. Jasmine – $253,102

10. Tiana- $84,882

 

Side note: Jasmine at 9th? Don’t even get me started. She’s an easy top 5 Princess in terms of hotness, character quality, and magic carpet riding ability. Maybe one of my biggest childhood crushes. Flow for months and the smile of the century.

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One Response

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  1. phante
    May 19, 2014 - 03:05 AM

    “Snow White and Cinderella are straight up the LeBron James and Kevin Durant of Disney princesses, and I think that’s the way it should be forever, right? ”

    out of every possible comp, you chose lebron and KD? we’re talking historical context here, so maybe try Bird and magic? wilt and russell? ricky and bobby even? horrible effort.

    I give this blog 1.4 pizzas out of 5.

    Reply

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